Every promise you've broken
You can have 'em back
Every favorite moment
Every panic attack
Every door left unopened
While I just stared through the crack
Don't know where this is going
And that's where I'm at.
And that's just the way it is
And that's just the way it is
I don't want your this... No
I don't want your that... No
I'm moving to Manhattan
and I'm never looking back
Never looking back never looking
I don't want your things... No
Don't care what you think... No
I'm moving to Manhattan
And I'm never looking back
Never looking back
Gonna hop on the next plane
And just see where it goes
Gonna empty my closet
Gonna throw out my clothes
I've got 200 dollars, a guitar and a coat
Yeah I hear it gets cold there
But I'm already froze
I don't want your this... No
I don't want your that... No
I'm moving to Manhattan
and I'm never looking back
Never looking back never looking
I don't want your things... No
Don't care what you think... No
I'm moving to Manhattan
And I'm never looking back
Never looking back
Never looking back
Never looking back
Ive learned to take it all in stride
To see the world with my own eyes
I've learned to trust the other side
Other side other side
I don't want your this
I don't want your that
I'm moving to Manhattan
and I'm never looking back
Never looking back never looking
I don't want your things... No
Don't care what you think... No
I'm moving to Manhattan
And I'm never looking back
Never looking back
I don't want your things
I don't care what you think
I'm moving to Manhattan
I'm moving to Manhattan
I don't care what you think
I don't care what you think
I'm moving to Manhattan
And I'm never looking back
Never looking back again
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Friday, October 23, 2009
Memory all alone in the moonlight...
Not a sound from the pavement
Has the moon lost her memory?
She is smiling alone
In the lamplight, the withered leaves collect at my feet
And the wind begins to moan
Memory
All alone in the moonlight
I can smile at the old days
I was beautiful then
I remember the time I knew what happiness was
Let the memory live again
Every streetlamp seems to beat a fatalistic warning
Someone mutters, and a streetlamp gutters,
And soon it will be morning.
Daylight
I must wait for the sunrise
And I mustn't give in.
When the dawn comes, tonight will be a memory too
And a new day will begin
Burnt out ends of smokey days
The stale cold smell of morning
The streetlamp dies, another night is over
Another day is dawning...
Touch me!
It's so easy to leave me
All alone with the memory
Of my days in the sun...
If you touch me, you'll understand what happiness is
Look, a new day
Has begun
Has the moon lost her memory?
She is smiling alone
In the lamplight, the withered leaves collect at my feet
And the wind begins to moan
Memory
All alone in the moonlight
I can smile at the old days
I was beautiful then
I remember the time I knew what happiness was
Let the memory live again
Every streetlamp seems to beat a fatalistic warning
Someone mutters, and a streetlamp gutters,
And soon it will be morning.
Daylight
I must wait for the sunrise
And I mustn't give in.
When the dawn comes, tonight will be a memory too
And a new day will begin
Burnt out ends of smokey days
The stale cold smell of morning
The streetlamp dies, another night is over
Another day is dawning...
Touch me!
It's so easy to leave me
All alone with the memory
Of my days in the sun...
If you touch me, you'll understand what happiness is
Look, a new day
Has begun
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Life
We go through day by day constantly thinking and worrying about ultimately insignificant matters, stressing and feeling bad about the hurtful words someone might have said, regretting the choices that we may have made - and constantly forgetting to just STOP and enjoy the beautiful sunset, smell the scent of new rain, appreciate the colors of the leaves, and be brightened by the warmth of the sun. So when you have a bad day, stop thinking about all the little things that has been making you feel so down, to just look up at the sky and realize how small your problem really is in comparison to the whole universe. And whisper a word of thanks for being alive, for having the chance to make a difference in the world, and for having the gift of LIFE. Too often we forget what really matters in this world - and we need to be reminded from time to time.
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Lessons Learned.
1) I am the strongest when life is the hardest, and I'm at my weakest when life no longer poses a challenge. Difficulties and obstacles in life are there to help me grow and stretch in order to become the person I was always meant to be.
2) It's okay to make mistakes. Everybody makes them. The important thing is to learn and grow from each one.
3) Don't look back into the past. We cannot change what has already happened, but we can direct what will happen in the future.
4) Embrace the place you are at. Whether you like your current situation or not, remember that this is exactly where you should be. Live in that moment fully because you will never get it back.
5) Choose to see the best in people. We all have our strengths and weaknesses, so choose to have a positive outlook in life and look for the best in others.
6) There are two types of people in this world: givers and takers. Be a giver, and not a taker.
7) Don't stoop down to a low level. You are an eagle, so soar like one. The crow will never be able to rise as high.
8) Understand that every single person in this world has an equal right and ability to find true, lasting, pure happiness.
9) You have to love yourself first, before you can love others.
10) True happiness is not fleeting. Learn to be at peace and rest within your soul no matter what circumstance you may be in.
11) I was not born to be average or lead a mediocre life. I was born to excel and succeed. I was born to be happy and to live life passionately.
12) Get up every morning and say to yourself, "I am excited about this day. Good things are going to happen to me today. The best is yet to come."
13) Nobody can be unhappy for long if they did exactly what they wanted, when they wanted to.
2) It's okay to make mistakes. Everybody makes them. The important thing is to learn and grow from each one.
3) Don't look back into the past. We cannot change what has already happened, but we can direct what will happen in the future.
4) Embrace the place you are at. Whether you like your current situation or not, remember that this is exactly where you should be. Live in that moment fully because you will never get it back.
5) Choose to see the best in people. We all have our strengths and weaknesses, so choose to have a positive outlook in life and look for the best in others.
6) There are two types of people in this world: givers and takers. Be a giver, and not a taker.
7) Don't stoop down to a low level. You are an eagle, so soar like one. The crow will never be able to rise as high.
8) Understand that every single person in this world has an equal right and ability to find true, lasting, pure happiness.
9) You have to love yourself first, before you can love others.
10) True happiness is not fleeting. Learn to be at peace and rest within your soul no matter what circumstance you may be in.
11) I was not born to be average or lead a mediocre life. I was born to excel and succeed. I was born to be happy and to live life passionately.
12) Get up every morning and say to yourself, "I am excited about this day. Good things are going to happen to me today. The best is yet to come."
13) Nobody can be unhappy for long if they did exactly what they wanted, when they wanted to.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Feelings
I once read in a book that our feelings and emotions are the guide to our happiness and our heart's deepest desires. If you are overwhelmed with positive, happy, and comforting emotions that means you are getting closer to your deepest desire. However, if you are feeling bad, regretful, guilty, or experience any type of negative emotion, that means you are going farther away from what you really want and what your heart is desiring. In order to be happy, you have to pay close attention to your emotions and feelings, because by paying attention to them you can turn the negative emotions into positive ones...and become closer to reaching your heart's deepest desire.
It sounds simple enough, but what do you do when you have conflicting emotions? Does that mean I don't know what my deepest desire is, or have I lost sight of it? I sure hope not.
It sounds simple enough, but what do you do when you have conflicting emotions? Does that mean I don't know what my deepest desire is, or have I lost sight of it? I sure hope not.
Monday, May 11, 2009
When one door closes, another one opens...
In less than 24 hours, my third year of nursing school, my junior year of college will be over! It's crazy to even imagine how fast this year has passed, but then again every year seems to pass by even more faster than the previous one...
I've finished three of my exams already and only have just one more to go so trying to pump myself up and get studying on that one instead of dying out in the end. I've done pretty good on the three exams so far, actually I've aced them so pretty happy and proud of myself! I think this semester I will be getting all A's! =D So happy and much improvement from last semester. I know I can do anything if I put my mind to it!
I have been thinking and coming to so many different realizations lately. First of all, I have tons of bright plans for this summer. I don't want to waste a single day of this summer because each day will be filled with something creative, fun, memorable, or knowledgable. I'm just praying to hear back from this externship position that I applied for the summer...and hoping and praying that I will be accepted because I would be able to get so much experience on the hospital floor and learn so many new things that I won't be able to otherwise.
I'm also working on a dress that I've been trying to produce for the past couple months..lol I've been busy and procrastinating a little bit. So I've realized that making a dress is actually a lot harder than you would think, and there are so many little things that go into it that if you don't have enough patience and will, you would just give up on the spot. I've actually already practiced making a halter top and a long sleeved shirt...both of which I totally messed up on, but that is okay because I learned from making each of them, which is why I'm sure my dress will be a huge success.
This past weekend I went to NYC and visited Central Park and the Metropolitan Museum. Right now is the best time ever to visit the city because it's beautiful there. The weather is just right, not too cold, not too hot, with a slight breeze...and all you need is a light jacket at night! I haven't been there in a while so it was very refreshing and just nice to be there and walk around for a while.
I've finished three of my exams already and only have just one more to go so trying to pump myself up and get studying on that one instead of dying out in the end. I've done pretty good on the three exams so far, actually I've aced them so pretty happy and proud of myself! I think this semester I will be getting all A's! =D So happy and much improvement from last semester. I know I can do anything if I put my mind to it!
I have been thinking and coming to so many different realizations lately. First of all, I have tons of bright plans for this summer. I don't want to waste a single day of this summer because each day will be filled with something creative, fun, memorable, or knowledgable. I'm just praying to hear back from this externship position that I applied for the summer...and hoping and praying that I will be accepted because I would be able to get so much experience on the hospital floor and learn so many new things that I won't be able to otherwise.
I'm also working on a dress that I've been trying to produce for the past couple months..lol I've been busy and procrastinating a little bit. So I've realized that making a dress is actually a lot harder than you would think, and there are so many little things that go into it that if you don't have enough patience and will, you would just give up on the spot. I've actually already practiced making a halter top and a long sleeved shirt...both of which I totally messed up on, but that is okay because I learned from making each of them, which is why I'm sure my dress will be a huge success.
This past weekend I went to NYC and visited Central Park and the Metropolitan Museum. Right now is the best time ever to visit the city because it's beautiful there. The weather is just right, not too cold, not too hot, with a slight breeze...and all you need is a light jacket at night! I haven't been there in a while so it was very refreshing and just nice to be there and walk around for a while.
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, Life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly...
Do you ever think about how much music affects our lives? I was just listening to some music and I just thought WOW, music brings back all kinds of memories...
The past is the past and we all grow up and move on, but when you listen to music that you used to listen to a long time ago, it brings back so much memories about those times and tugs at your heart. I love that feeling, and I love even more that I can look back at memories of myself when I was younger and smile about it, not regretting anything I've done. I feel like I've learned so much and grown up and matured in just the 2 years that I've been away from home but I still have a long way to go to being the person that I ultimately want to become.
I feel like I'm not that innocent little girl I used to be a couple years ago. I've learned about life, relationships, and myself. I've learned that I'm so much stronger than I ever believed I was, and that I can get through any obstacle that is thrown in my way to reach my goals. In the past I've felt like I could not go own, that life was so unfair, and I must be the only person in the world who was feeling so much pain. I really believed that it was too hard and I was going to give up. But looking back now, I realize that no matter how bad I felt, how discouraged and down I was, I still got through those times and I have come out a better, stronger, and more confident person than I was before. I am lucky enough to have such great support persons and wonderful parents who have always encouraged me to pursue my dreams and reach beyond my goals to be the best person that I can be and more. I think the most valuable lesson I have learned from my parents is that, you can only reach as far as your dreams. If you dream small, then you will reach small results, but if you dream big, you will achieve big results. You are only as big as your dream. This is why I've always learned to dream big, on a gigantic scale. I dream that I will make a big change and a huge contribution to the world someday, in some specific way. Some people laugh at my dreams and say that it may be impossible or I may be crazy, but who's to say really? If I never dream big dreams...I will never achieve big results...and I want to reach the top.
One of my favorite quotes since I was a little girl is, "Reach for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars." I remember the first time I ever saw this quotes was on the wall of my sixth grade classroom, and ever since then it has always stuck with me in the back of my mind. It reminds me that no matter what, I should always reach for the top, strive to be the best, and to accomplish the impossible because I have got nothing to lose, and EVERYTHING to gain.
The past is the past and we all grow up and move on, but when you listen to music that you used to listen to a long time ago, it brings back so much memories about those times and tugs at your heart. I love that feeling, and I love even more that I can look back at memories of myself when I was younger and smile about it, not regretting anything I've done. I feel like I've learned so much and grown up and matured in just the 2 years that I've been away from home but I still have a long way to go to being the person that I ultimately want to become.
I feel like I'm not that innocent little girl I used to be a couple years ago. I've learned about life, relationships, and myself. I've learned that I'm so much stronger than I ever believed I was, and that I can get through any obstacle that is thrown in my way to reach my goals. In the past I've felt like I could not go own, that life was so unfair, and I must be the only person in the world who was feeling so much pain. I really believed that it was too hard and I was going to give up. But looking back now, I realize that no matter how bad I felt, how discouraged and down I was, I still got through those times and I have come out a better, stronger, and more confident person than I was before. I am lucky enough to have such great support persons and wonderful parents who have always encouraged me to pursue my dreams and reach beyond my goals to be the best person that I can be and more. I think the most valuable lesson I have learned from my parents is that, you can only reach as far as your dreams. If you dream small, then you will reach small results, but if you dream big, you will achieve big results. You are only as big as your dream. This is why I've always learned to dream big, on a gigantic scale. I dream that I will make a big change and a huge contribution to the world someday, in some specific way. Some people laugh at my dreams and say that it may be impossible or I may be crazy, but who's to say really? If I never dream big dreams...I will never achieve big results...and I want to reach the top.
One of my favorite quotes since I was a little girl is, "Reach for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars." I remember the first time I ever saw this quotes was on the wall of my sixth grade classroom, and ever since then it has always stuck with me in the back of my mind. It reminds me that no matter what, I should always reach for the top, strive to be the best, and to accomplish the impossible because I have got nothing to lose, and EVERYTHING to gain.
Friday, April 24, 2009
Oyutan Amidral
This video is sooo funny...especially in the beginning. It gets a little bit violent toward the end, but the first part is hilarious...I think all students have been at this point at least once. =D
Thursday, April 23, 2009
FREE HUGS
So It's ALREADY Thursday, which means, the week is ALMOST over, because tomorrow is Friday! duh! Lol so that made me happy since these last couple weeks have been stressfull with tons of exams. I just had 2 exams this week, and you know what? I actually feel pretty good about them, and I'm pretty sure I got As on both (still haven't received my grade for them). I think I'm really catching up to this Nursing stuff...especially since last semester. Man, compared to Fall semester, this one is Definitely a turnaround..in a good way. =D
Sometimes when I get bored or want to procrastinate instead of doing some homework, I go on youtube and watch a million gazillion videos. I swear, youtube has freaking everything! They can anything from make-up videos to c/section, birthing videos (trust me...I've watched 'em all..) One type of video I really enjoy watching are all the Mongolian ones. I think especially since I'm so far away from home, it just gives me a nice fuzzy feeling to watch videos from Mongolia and helps me feel closer in a way. I love all the Mongolian music videos (usually they are not so good, but the songs are awesome), and the hoshing shogs (lol comics I guess would be the word in English), and just yesterday I discovered a really cool video. It's called FREE HUGS in Mongolia. 3 or 4 people are just holding up signs that say FREE HUGS in the streets of Ulaanbaatar and offering hugs to whoever wants it. It's actually pretty funny in the beginning, because I think Mongolians are pretty weary of strangers and some of them actually looked kinda scared, but most people were cool with the hugs. It just gave me a nice feeling too because it was such a cute video and nice to see people actually do these things. If I had the chance, I would absolutely LOVE to do that too! So here is the video....enjoy it!
Sometimes when I get bored or want to procrastinate instead of doing some homework, I go on youtube and watch a million gazillion videos. I swear, youtube has freaking everything! They can anything from make-up videos to c/section, birthing videos (trust me...I've watched 'em all..) One type of video I really enjoy watching are all the Mongolian ones. I think especially since I'm so far away from home, it just gives me a nice fuzzy feeling to watch videos from Mongolia and helps me feel closer in a way. I love all the Mongolian music videos (usually they are not so good, but the songs are awesome), and the hoshing shogs (lol comics I guess would be the word in English), and just yesterday I discovered a really cool video. It's called FREE HUGS in Mongolia. 3 or 4 people are just holding up signs that say FREE HUGS in the streets of Ulaanbaatar and offering hugs to whoever wants it. It's actually pretty funny in the beginning, because I think Mongolians are pretty weary of strangers and some of them actually looked kinda scared, but most people were cool with the hugs. It just gave me a nice feeling too because it was such a cute video and nice to see people actually do these things. If I had the chance, I would absolutely LOVE to do that too! So here is the video....enjoy it!
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
(Soul)Mate
So I read a book way back, called "Brida" by Paulo Coelho. This was one of the first books I have read from this Brazilian author, and I absolutely loved it. I also adore one of his other works, "The Warrior of Light". The themes and ideas he has in his book are so insightful and profound.
Anyway, in his book Brida, Paulo Coelho wrote about one philosophy of what a soulmate really is, and I really, I mean REALLY liked this description. If you believe in reincarnation, you believe that once someone dies, they are reincarnated into a different lifetime. If everyone was reincarnated again, then how come millions of years ago there were so few people, and now there are hundreds of billions of people? One explanation is that when a person is reincarnated, their soul divides. And in the next lifetime, when you meet your soul - that is called Love. That is why true love is the greatest feeling in the world - it is because the two souls are coming together again as one. This is the reason for the name "soulmate". You are supposed to find your soulmate and live together happily ever after, because this is the destiny...the two souls eventually coming together in harmony.
However, when you are reincarnated, your soul can divide into more than 2 halves. This explains why some people can actually fall in true love more than once in their lifetime, because they have met more than one soulmate. This unfortunately, causes a lot of pain and heartache to everyone involved.
Paulo Coelho also talks about how some loves do not last forever. You can meet your soulmate and live together forever. Or you may pass by them every single day and not even know it. You may meet them one special day and spend an amazing, unforgettable night with them, never to see them again. And that will be okay because the love you felt in that one single night was so supreme and untouchable, it is enough to last you a lifetime.
People will know when they meet their soulmates because you will see a light in their eyes that you haven't seen in anyone else. True love is free and trusting. It does not cling on, it does not try to change the other person into something different. It is a love so strong it will last forever.
the MEANING of my life...
What is the Meaning of Life? Humans have been asking themselves this question for generations and generations, and coming up with their own ideas, theories, and philosophies on what the real meaning of life is, and the reason we are here on this planet earth. I know I have asked myself this question, and I would think many people out there have at one point in their lives have pondered this topic as well. I was so intrigued by this question, that my freshmen year of college, I even took a class that was called, The Meaning of Life. I took this class in hopes of coming closer to the answer to this question that I had about Life, but ironically, I did not reach any conclusions. In fact, after this class I had even more questions than before. Thinking back, we did not really discuss the Meaning of Life in my The Meaning of Life class, but what we did was read historical writings from various philosophers such as Aristotle and Plato. It was interesting of course, but I just ended up with even more questions, and not a lot of answers.
I've heard many different theories on the meaning of life. Some would say the meaning of life is to find your passion in life. Some say the meaning of life is happiness. Others believe the meaning of life is to find the meaning of life. And yet others disagree, stating that there is no meaning to life. I believe the meaning of life is different for everyone, because although we are all humans, we have all been brought up in different situations, with different teachings and beliefs. Doubtless, there are many universal truths about life that would encompass everyone such as happiness, but I believe that each individual has their own idea about what life is and what they can achieve from Life. This is why I decided to write this piece, to reveal what my meaning of Life is Today. I will write on this same topic each year, because I want to see how this meaning will change and grow for me as I mature.
Currently, my meaning of Life is to find Peace and Happiness within myself. I realize that what many people think of as "happiness" is not true happiness. Happiness is fleeting, but pure happiness stays forever, because it is the type that grows inside you. So many times, we let others decide and control our happiness because we are humans, and we are social beings, and we are very much affected by others opinions. For example, if someone were to tell me I looked pretty today, it would make me happy. But if someone said my shirt was ugly, it would make me sad. This is not true happiness, this is simply allowing others to choose your happiness.
The true happiness I am seeking in my life is the type that will bring me peace. This type of happiness would not care if someone was mean to me, it would not get sad because someone made a bad remark...this type of happiness would know I really am, and would not be hurt or saddened by other people, situations, or remarks. I am also seeking peace within myself and within this world. This peace will allow me to feel 100% comfortable in my own skin, understand my flaws and imperfections, and still love myself anyway. This peace will clear my head of all the negative or pessimistic beliefs and thoughts, and fill my heart, brain, and soul with love, life, and courage to achieve anything I want.
I have so many dreams and so many goals for my life, that sometimes I just feel suffocated because I cannot achieve them as fast as I'd like to. First I have to finish college, then work for a bit, make some money, and really set my dreams into action. So currently my meaning of life is to find peace and happiness in my life. I am happy, but I don't think I have really achieve the true, pure type of happiness that is not fleeting. I'm getting there though, but I still have some ways to go. I hope that next year when I write this blog again, I will have more insights into what the meaning of life is, and I hope to have made improvements within myself in reaching true happiness and peace within myself.
I've heard many different theories on the meaning of life. Some would say the meaning of life is to find your passion in life. Some say the meaning of life is happiness. Others believe the meaning of life is to find the meaning of life. And yet others disagree, stating that there is no meaning to life. I believe the meaning of life is different for everyone, because although we are all humans, we have all been brought up in different situations, with different teachings and beliefs. Doubtless, there are many universal truths about life that would encompass everyone such as happiness, but I believe that each individual has their own idea about what life is and what they can achieve from Life. This is why I decided to write this piece, to reveal what my meaning of Life is Today. I will write on this same topic each year, because I want to see how this meaning will change and grow for me as I mature.
Currently, my meaning of Life is to find Peace and Happiness within myself. I realize that what many people think of as "happiness" is not true happiness. Happiness is fleeting, but pure happiness stays forever, because it is the type that grows inside you. So many times, we let others decide and control our happiness because we are humans, and we are social beings, and we are very much affected by others opinions. For example, if someone were to tell me I looked pretty today, it would make me happy. But if someone said my shirt was ugly, it would make me sad. This is not true happiness, this is simply allowing others to choose your happiness.
The true happiness I am seeking in my life is the type that will bring me peace. This type of happiness would not care if someone was mean to me, it would not get sad because someone made a bad remark...this type of happiness would know I really am, and would not be hurt or saddened by other people, situations, or remarks. I am also seeking peace within myself and within this world. This peace will allow me to feel 100% comfortable in my own skin, understand my flaws and imperfections, and still love myself anyway. This peace will clear my head of all the negative or pessimistic beliefs and thoughts, and fill my heart, brain, and soul with love, life, and courage to achieve anything I want.
I have so many dreams and so many goals for my life, that sometimes I just feel suffocated because I cannot achieve them as fast as I'd like to. First I have to finish college, then work for a bit, make some money, and really set my dreams into action. So currently my meaning of life is to find peace and happiness in my life. I am happy, but I don't think I have really achieve the true, pure type of happiness that is not fleeting. I'm getting there though, but I still have some ways to go. I hope that next year when I write this blog again, I will have more insights into what the meaning of life is, and I hope to have made improvements within myself in reaching true happiness and peace within myself.
You and I
"don't you worry, there my honey
we might not have any money
but we've got our love to pay the bills
maybe I think you're cute and funny,
maybe I wanna do what bunnies do with you,
if you know what I mean
Oh, let's get rich and buy our parents homes in the South of France
let's get rich and give everybody nice sweaters
and teach them how to dance
let's get rich and build our house on a mountain
making everybody look like ants
from way up there, you and I, you and I
well you might be a bit confused
and you might be a little bit bruised
but baby how we spoon like no one else
so I will help you read those books
if you will soothe my worried looks
and we will put the lonesome on the shelf
oh let’s get rich and buy our parents homes in the South of France
let's get rich and give everybody nice sweaters
and teach them how to dance
let's get rich and build our house on a mountain
making everybody look like ants
from way up there you and I, you and I"
Ingrid Michaelson
we might not have any money
but we've got our love to pay the bills
maybe I think you're cute and funny,
maybe I wanna do what bunnies do with you,
if you know what I mean
Oh, let's get rich and buy our parents homes in the South of France
let's get rich and give everybody nice sweaters
and teach them how to dance
let's get rich and build our house on a mountain
making everybody look like ants
from way up there, you and I, you and I
well you might be a bit confused
and you might be a little bit bruised
but baby how we spoon like no one else
so I will help you read those books
if you will soothe my worried looks
and we will put the lonesome on the shelf
oh let’s get rich and buy our parents homes in the South of France
let's get rich and give everybody nice sweaters
and teach them how to dance
let's get rich and build our house on a mountain
making everybody look like ants
from way up there you and I, you and I"
Ingrid Michaelson
Monday, April 20, 2009
yesterday
Mr. Blue,
I told you that I love you
Please believe me
Mr. Blue,
I have to go now, darling
Don't be angry
I know that you're tired
Know that you're sore and sick and sad for some reason
So I leave you with a smile
Kiss you on the cheek
and you will call it treason
That's the way it goes some days
A fever comes at you without a warning
And I can see it in your face
You've been waiting to break since you woke up this morning
Mr. Blue,
Don't hold your head so low
That you can't see the sky
Mr. Blue,
It ain't so long since you were flying high
I told you that I love you
Please believe me
Mr. Blue,
I have to go now, darling
Don't be angry
I know that you're tired
Know that you're sore and sick and sad for some reason
So I leave you with a smile
Kiss you on the cheek
and you will call it treason
That's the way it goes some days
A fever comes at you without a warning
And I can see it in your face
You've been waiting to break since you woke up this morning
Mr. Blue,
Don't hold your head so low
That you can't see the sky
Mr. Blue,
It ain't so long since you were flying high
Thursday, April 16, 2009
aww
Good Mouning Pee Weee
Me mess you veui veui much. Me invites you to a big big lunch in the Pavillion once you open your sweet eyes.
Me kees kees kees you.
Me mess you veui veui much. Me invites you to a big big lunch in the Pavillion once you open your sweet eyes.
Me kees kees kees you.
Monday, April 13, 2009
i carry your heart with me
i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Stay With Me
"When you love somebody, you should follow your heart. Sometimes when you are with the person you love the most, you feel confused. You don’t know who you are or what you want but that is totally understandable. It is natural to let go of a part of yourself to be with that person but the important part is that you don’t lose your own identity in the process!"
"A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous."
"...we accept the love we think we deserve."
"I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way."
"But you are, you know you were, the nearest thing to a real story to happen in my life."
"There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but I've loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me, this has always been enough."
"I love you as certain darks things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul."
"He's more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same."
"Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion, it is not the desire to mate every second minute of the day, it is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every cranny of your body. No, don't blush, I am telling you some truths. That is just being "in love", which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident."
"Love is so short, forgetting is so long."
"Anyone who falls in love is searching for the missing pieces of themselves. So anyone who's in love gets sad when they think of their lover. It's like stepping back inside a room you have fond memories of, one you haven't seen in a long time."
"Have you ever lost yourself in a kiss? I mean pure psychedelic inebriation. Not just lustful petting but transcendental metamorphosis when you became aware that the greatness of this being was breathing into you. Licking the sides and corners of your mouth, like sealing a thousand fleshy envelopes filled with the essence of your passionate being and then opened by the same mouth and delivered back to you, over and over again - the first kiss of the rest of your life. A kiss that confirms that the universe is aligned, that the world's greatest resource is love, and maybe even that God is a woman. With or without a belief in God, all kisses are metaphors decipherable by allocations of time, circumstance, and understanding."
"The love that moves the sun and the other stars."
"A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous."
"...we accept the love we think we deserve."
"I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way."
"But you are, you know you were, the nearest thing to a real story to happen in my life."
"There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but I've loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me, this has always been enough."
"I love you as certain darks things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul."
"He's more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same."
"Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion, it is not the desire to mate every second minute of the day, it is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every cranny of your body. No, don't blush, I am telling you some truths. That is just being "in love", which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident."
"Love is so short, forgetting is so long."
"Anyone who falls in love is searching for the missing pieces of themselves. So anyone who's in love gets sad when they think of their lover. It's like stepping back inside a room you have fond memories of, one you haven't seen in a long time."
"Have you ever lost yourself in a kiss? I mean pure psychedelic inebriation. Not just lustful petting but transcendental metamorphosis when you became aware that the greatness of this being was breathing into you. Licking the sides and corners of your mouth, like sealing a thousand fleshy envelopes filled with the essence of your passionate being and then opened by the same mouth and delivered back to you, over and over again - the first kiss of the rest of your life. A kiss that confirms that the universe is aligned, that the world's greatest resource is love, and maybe even that God is a woman. With or without a belief in God, all kisses are metaphors decipherable by allocations of time, circumstance, and understanding."
"The love that moves the sun and the other stars."
Monday, April 6, 2009
I am strong.
I am strong because I am weak.
I am beautiful because I know my flaws.
I am a lover because I am a fighter.
I am fearless because I have been afraid.
I am wise because I have been foolish.
& I can laugh because I've known sadness.
I am beautiful because I know my flaws.
I am a lover because I am a fighter.
I am fearless because I have been afraid.
I am wise because I have been foolish.
& I can laugh because I've known sadness.
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Serenity
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Friday, April 3, 2009
home is where the heart is
“A man travels the world over in search of what he needs, and returns home to find it.”
“When you look at your life, the greatest happinesses are family happinesses.”
"Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in."
“What's the good of news if you haven't a sister to share it?”
"If your sister is in a tearing hurry to go out and cannot catch your eye, she's wearing your best sweater."
“Youth fades, love droops, the leaves of friendship fall; a mother's secret hope outlives them all.”
“A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie.”
“A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials, heavy and sudden, fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends who rejoice with us in our sunshine, desert us when troubles thicken around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts.”
“When you look at your life, the greatest happinesses are family happinesses.”
"Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in."
“What's the good of news if you haven't a sister to share it?”
"If your sister is in a tearing hurry to go out and cannot catch your eye, she's wearing your best sweater."
“Youth fades, love droops, the leaves of friendship fall; a mother's secret hope outlives them all.”
“A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie.”
“A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials, heavy and sudden, fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends who rejoice with us in our sunshine, desert us when troubles thicken around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts.”
life advice
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth.
Oh, never mind.
You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded.
But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.
You are not as fat as you imagine.
Don't worry about the future.
Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum.
The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind.
The kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing every day that scares you.
Don't waste your time on jealousy.
Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind.
The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard.
Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.
Travel.
Accept certain inalienable truths:
Prices will rise.
Politicians will philander.
You, too, will get old.
And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.
Don’t cry over anything that can’t cry over you.
Write poetry.
Love Deeply.
Walk barefoot.
Dance with wild abandon.
Cry at the movies.
When you give someone your time, you are giving them a portion of your life that you ' ll never get back.
Your time is your life. That is why the greatest gift you can give to someone is your time.
To make yourself happy, pursue your passions & be the best of what you can be.
Simplify your life. Take away the clutter.
Get rid of destructive elements: abusive friends, nasty habits, and dangerous liaisons.
Don't abandon your responsibilities but don't overdose on duty.
Oh, never mind.
You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded.
But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.
You are not as fat as you imagine.
Don't worry about the future.
Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum.
The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind.
The kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing every day that scares you.
Don't waste your time on jealousy.
Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind.
The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard.
Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.
Travel.
Accept certain inalienable truths:
Prices will rise.
Politicians will philander.
You, too, will get old.
And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.
Don’t cry over anything that can’t cry over you.
Write poetry.
Love Deeply.
Walk barefoot.
Dance with wild abandon.
Cry at the movies.
When you give someone your time, you are giving them a portion of your life that you ' ll never get back.
Your time is your life. That is why the greatest gift you can give to someone is your time.
To make yourself happy, pursue your passions & be the best of what you can be.
Simplify your life. Take away the clutter.
Get rid of destructive elements: abusive friends, nasty habits, and dangerous liaisons.
Don't abandon your responsibilities but don't overdose on duty.
Monday, March 30, 2009
every little thing is gonna be alright.
"I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain."
"Life is unsure, always eat your dessert first."
"Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny."
"What most people need to learn in life is how to love people and use things instead of using people and loving things."
"The hardest thing in life, is letting go of what you thought was real."
"Life is unsure, always eat your dessert first."
"Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny."
"What most people need to learn in life is how to love people and use things instead of using people and loving things."
"The hardest thing in life, is letting go of what you thought was real."
Friday, March 27, 2009
Street Children of Mongolia.
http://www.cncf.org/en/news/view.php?id=1264
http://abcnews.go.com/WNT/International/story?id=1350000
"Children’s rights? We have nothing. We’re just like human garbage. Nobody needs us. Anyone can come and beat us. I want to go to a place where there is no beating. Recently children from that house [points to a residential apartment block nearby] came over and hit us all for no reason. The police come to us only if a theft happens nearby. They take us to the police station where they beat and beat demanding we confess to stealing. They force us to sit on a stool like this [arches his back] and then beat us with batons. Or they tie you tightly on a bench, insert a wooden pole between the legs, right below the crotch and then start rolling it... so-o-o painful.
Once, right when they were doing this to me, a police officer came in. ‘What are you doing?’ ‘He has stolen things,’ answered the man hurting me. I screamed ‘I did not steal anything. They torture me, telling to admit that I did.’ The officer ordered them to release me. This happened last year. Now the police are a bit quiet. Once in a while they come over our pit, look inside with flashlights and ask if we have knives or other weapons.
People rarely help us. Most are suspicious of us, thinking we are all thieves. There is a man named Ochir who lives nearby and operates a depot where people give bottles and cans. He is a very good man. Often he allows us to sleep at the depot building. Even brings in a TV set. Channel 25’s programme about computer games is good. Once I saw a programme by Gurbazar [a popular TV journalist] where twins – both now old women – meet after many years apart.
All people want to have a good life. I do not know what my life will be like when I grow up. I am afraid that I will die one day with my whole life spent like this, collecting bottles. Life is given only once and I am scared that I will see no good times." (http://www.newint.org/issue377/dolgion.htm)
Street children in Mongolia....it is such a tragic story. Some people wouldn't even believe things like this exist, but it does - and it's heartbreaking. Just reading these stories or seeing the videos on youtube touches my heart. When I was younger and lived in Mongolia, I didn't really feel bad for them. I don't know if it was my young age, or just the fact that I had grown up in this type of reality where there were street children everywhere, and that was just the norm. But now that I am removed from this reality, and placed in a different one where there are hardly any such cases, I can really look back and realize the tragedy of this story. One day once I have gained the money and the power I will go back and help decrease this population of kids.
While I was reading these stories I keep going over the same type of story with each one. Most of these homeless children ran away from home because they were so abused mentally and physically by their parents or caregivers. They were abused and beaten so badly that it was better to live out on the street with no money, food, or shelter - than stay at home. What does that say about the adults in Mongolia? There must be some pretty terrible beatings going on...
I don't know why but I think it's in the Mongolian tradition and culture to physically punish the children. Most every Mongolian child I know has been beaten in their lifetime by their parents, and that is a natural way of raising a child in Mongolia. It's sad because even though the kids were physically abused and they suffer a lot from the emotional and mental damages of the beatings, they grow up and do the same things to their children too. I think it is one big habit that is difficult to break.
Medical and psychological research has shown that beating a child is not the right way to discipline them, in fact it is one of the worst ways you can discipline your child:
"Based on the principles of aversive therapy, inflicting pain through spanking causes a dramatic short-term decrease in the behavior. However, there are serious flaws in this approach: (1) it teaches children that violence is acceptable; (2) it may physically harm the child if it is the result of parental rage; and (3) children become “accustomed” to spanking, requiring more severe corporal punishment each time. Spanking can result in severe physical and psychologic injury, and it interferes with effective parent-child interaction. In addition, when the parent is not around, the misbehavior is likely to occur, since children have not learned to behave well for their own sake. Parental use of corporal punishment may also interfere with the child's development of moral reasoning." (Wong's Essential of Pediatric Nursing)
So basically beating your child will:
- Teach them that violence is acceptable (which explains why if you were beaten in your
childhood, it instantly becomes normal and acceptable to you and it's more likely for you to beat your children when you grow up)
- Interferes with your interaction with the child and builds up walls between you and them
because now they are so scared of you why would they want to share anything with you about their thoughts or feelings?
- It's not successful in changing the behavior that you were trying to change
- And it will affect their moral reasoning...and they will probably believe that physical abuse is okay, and that it is okay to hit or punch their loved ones too.
So...anyways, getting back to the first point about homeless children in Mongolia, I was just trying to say that to decrease so many children from going out into the streets depends on the parents and caregivers. The children are on the streets because they are not in a safe or loving home environment and they run away. I read that about 4,000 children are on the streets, but this may have decreased by now, hopefully. But 4,000? That is a lot of parents who are beating their kids so badly that they would want to run away!
The parents/caregivers may be beating their children because of the difficult conditions of living in Mongolia presently with the break from the Communist government and the attempt to build a Democratic one, but still...they shouldn't take it out on the children.
I really hope these homeless children in Mongolia will decrease in the future, and more of them will find a safe, caring home atmosphere where they can grow up in. I know I will help in the future, and I also wish that more young Mongolian students like me studying or working in different countries will go back one day and contribute to their home country.
zurheen chamd aldchihlaa
Zuruud unguruhiin tudiid
Zurheen chamd aldchihlaa
Zuruulj tuuniigee avah geed
Uuriiguu bas aldchihlaa
blue on black
Blue on black
Tears on a river
Push on a shove
It don't mean much
Joker on jack
Match on a fire
Cold on ice
A dead mans touch
Whisper on a scream
Doesn't change a thing
Don't bring you back
Blue on black
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
the littlest things that take me there...
I would spread the cloths under your feet:
But I, being poor, have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.
You must love yourself before you love another.
By accepting yourself and fully being what you are...
your simple presence can make others happy.
It matters not
who you love,
where you love,
why you love,
when you love,
or how you love,
It matters only
that You love.
Believe in love. Believe in magic. Believe in Santa Claus. Believe in others. Believe in yourself. Believe in your dreams. If you don't, who will?
There are things you do because they feel right and they may make no sense and they may make no money and it may be the real reason we are here: to love each other and to eat each other's cooking and say it was good.
This is what enlightenment is all about - a deep understanding that there is no problem. Then, with no problem to solve, what will you do? Immediately you start living. You will eat, you will sleep, you will love, you will work, you will have a chit-chat, you will sing, you will dance - what else is there to do?
It really doesn't matter if the person who hurt you deserves to be forgiven. Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. You have things to do and you want to move on.
Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything - all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.
The past does not equal the future.
Because you may have failed a moment ago,
all day today,
or for the last six months,
or for the last sixteen years,
or for the last fifty years of your life
doesn't mean anything.
All that matters is
what are you going to do now?
"The little plans I tried to carry
Have failed
O' Dear God.
But, I will not sorrow
I will pause a little while
And try again tomorrow."
But I, being poor, have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.
You must love yourself before you love another.
By accepting yourself and fully being what you are...
your simple presence can make others happy.
It matters not
who you love,
where you love,
why you love,
when you love,
or how you love,
It matters only
that You love.
Believe in love. Believe in magic. Believe in Santa Claus. Believe in others. Believe in yourself. Believe in your dreams. If you don't, who will?
There are things you do because they feel right and they may make no sense and they may make no money and it may be the real reason we are here: to love each other and to eat each other's cooking and say it was good.
This is what enlightenment is all about - a deep understanding that there is no problem. Then, with no problem to solve, what will you do? Immediately you start living. You will eat, you will sleep, you will love, you will work, you will have a chit-chat, you will sing, you will dance - what else is there to do?
It really doesn't matter if the person who hurt you deserves to be forgiven. Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. You have things to do and you want to move on.
Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything - all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.
The past does not equal the future.
Because you may have failed a moment ago,
all day today,
or for the last six months,
or for the last sixteen years,
or for the last fifty years of your life
doesn't mean anything.
All that matters is
what are you going to do now?
"The little plans I tried to carry
Have failed
O' Dear God.
But, I will not sorrow
I will pause a little while
And try again tomorrow."
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Close to you
On the day that you were born, the angels got together and decided to create a dream come true. So they sprinkled moon dust in your hair of gold. And starlight in your eyes of blue. That is why all the girls in town, follow you all around. Just like me, they long to be Close to you...
Not all relationships are meant to last forever. Sometimes, just an hour is enough to touch your heart.
Not all relationships are meant to last forever. Sometimes, just an hour is enough to touch your heart.
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